From the heart

Valentine's day cards are generally way too sappy and fake. I mean, really, a card with a picture of a silouetted couple on the front and a canned message inside is supposed to get you some leg?

Not for me. I've decided to post my superior-awesome Valentine's Day poem to my beloved on my blog for the whole world (or the three or four people who read it) to see:



Your love is better than bacon
or finding a 20 dollar bill in my coat

Your love is better than sunshine
and chocolate and freedom and whiskey
or clean laundry or curried goat

without you life would be cruel, nasty and banal
it would suck, much worse, than being hungover at the dentist getting a root canal (with Celine Dion music playing in the background)

I love the things you don't like about yourself
like the body parts you think are too big

I love you more than the gays like the showtunes
I need you more than Harry Connick Jr. needs a gig
(really, what's he been doing lately?)

Your beauty makes me feel giggly and warm
like a schedule one drug

And right now I need a fix,
c'mon baby gimme a hug
(like 50 cent)

You're prettier than new money
sexier than a rare, ribeye steak

You smell nicer than a Bed Bath and Beyond
you make other women jealous and say 'gimme a break'

Some may hate you cause you're beautiful
but let them haters hate

All that matters is I love you
This is a celebration bitches - let's celebrate!

Happy Valentine's Day baby

When the Levees Broke

Watched the Spike Lee documentary, "When the Levees Broke" last night. It is probably the closest any outsider can get to what happened to the people who got flooded out of their homes and their lives.

I took this photo of an old cemetery in New Orleans in 2006. Mrs. M and I loved our visit. The people were great; food spectacular; music amazing. But after watching the documentary last night, we realized that we missed so much. The city will never be what is used to be.

That's a crying shame.

Another great photo

This is the first car I bought with my own money. A 1971 Plymouth Valiant. I bought it for $600 from a dude who used to drive the inter-campus shuttle which I took from class to work everyday when I was in college.

The bus driver was a Jehovah's Witness. I found out after I asked him one day if he voted during the last election. He told me his religion forbade him from taking part in such earthly, secular activities. I asked him, 'well, what if someone that you thought was evil was running for president. And your vote was the best way to stop him?' He told me that was up to the lord to handle.

Anyway, I loved the Valiant. In this picture it's parked behind the house I lived in during much of my college days. The house was located downtown, 1212 S. 7th street. 1212 was the scene of a lot of keggers, brawls, all kinds of sex, drug use and a few mice.

Oh yeah, the car. It was so cool. But one day, while I was stuck in traffic, it overheated and burned up the engine. It would have cost three times what I paid for the car to fix it. I was heartbroken, but, then again, it was just a car.

I got another one later. But you never forget your first.

The greatest thing since, well, bacon

Hats off to the 'Breakfast Blogger' for bringing the 'bacon weave' to my attention. How many times have you been eating a supertastydelicious BLT or bacon double cheeseburger, and you have to keep re-adjusting your bacon? It shifts around because the lettuce and mayo is slippery. And of course, you want to make sure you get some salty, smoky goodness in every bite.

I've got to try this soon.